Synthetic Love

Synthetic Love

By: Elaina Grace Morgan

It was the summer of 2000 whatever when I was wrapped in a blanket of synthetic love.

I had known that real love was wrapped in swaddling clothes..lying in a manger.

But this kind of blanket birthed a stranger to it.

I didn't see that this blanket was fabricated

By lies and manipulation,

Dedicated constantly to seeing me come to the end of my rope,

Dedicated to pushing and shoving me so that I'd lose all of my hope..

Even if it meant tattooing a name on me - hypocrite.

Yet the next day supposedly God's grace was sufficient,

And it really only applied to it..

In every relationship.

I became weak.

I heard of intoxicating love,

But I was intoxicated by drugs at the end of the week.

So much pressure on every side of me that somehow freedom was too far off,

Because I had forgotten my worth

With every single abusive word.

It was not too long after being freed from that

That synthetic love decided to come back in a new form.

It wrapped me up again,

Reminiscing wanting to play pretend.

It really took God uncovering all that He needed to mend

For me not to think and feel obligated..

To bend over backwards to please synthetic love,

That real love

Hanging up on that cross,

Rich in mercy

Made me fearfully..

Intricately.

The Dangers of Dabbling With Demons

    So for a while I have been contemplating about whether or not I should post what I am about to post because I knew I was going to get a lot of backfire and accusations in return for it as well as people telling me I haven't forgiven and so on and so forth, but after spending some time with my sweet Savior I feel led to move past what people think. HE has something to say through all of this, and I would have to say that the thing I struggled with most was lust. As most of my consistent readers know I was introduced to masturbation at nine years old. It became an addiction that if I didn't partake in it, then I wouldn't be able to go to sleep until maybe about 2 and sometimes 3 in the morning. I experienced the Holy Spirit for the first time in 2010. It became all too real for me for the first time in my life. It wasn't my parents' faith, it wasn't my friends' faith; it was my faith. It was personal now, me and Jesus.

    I was FREE from an addiction I had for ten years just like that. You see it's still something I struggle with at times though the power of prayer, the power of COMMUNICATING with the Son of God makes it easy to say no to. I fell several times since then particularly one relationship a year ago that I went into. I was free from this addiction for months when I woke up masturbating one night. I felt absolutely, utterly DISGUSTED. I look back at it with a new perspective on spiritual warfare and now I see that it was a demonic spirit that I had let into my life through this relationship. If that wasn't a good enough example for you later in that relationship I opened the door to Satan through sin which is the abode of demonic activity. (I'm SO glad I am free from these spirits now! :-))

    You see sex is more than just a physical exchange. It is a spiritual exchange. Mark 10:8 - "...and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh." What fellowship does the dark have with the light!? NONE. It is easier for someone to pull you down than it is for you to pull them up especially when lust is involved. In God's Word adultery is spoken about A LOT. I believe it is Satan's main choice of weapon especially in this day and age. Like I said when you sleep with somebody it is a spiritual exchange. Whatever they are dealing with in the spiritual realm you will start to experience and yes, sleeping with demons is possible. (Genesis 6) Towards the end of that relationship I started dealing with spirits that I had never dealt with before. Right now I am trying to be wise about the depth of what I share about this so I pray that from what I am sharing you all will see the importance of this warning.

The Dangers of Dabbling With Demons and Sitting With Satan:

1. Death. (We know the wages of sin is death. When you dabble with demons you will have more close calls to it as you have stepped out from under the hand of God's protection for your own desires. I experienced many close calls when I was sitting in this kind of sin of disobedience by not running from it where death tried to grab me. Of course God has more power than Satan and demons combined could ever have. Satan is not God's equal. Every knee WILL bow and every tongue WILL confess HE is Lord.)
2. Feelings of being stuck. (The reality is you are stuck if you're trying to get out from under this influence in your own strength. Cry out to God and ask Him for help. Ask earnestly!)
3. Things that don't make sense. (I had an incidence where I was sitting in my car on the way home at a stoplight playing my Jesus music one day and the lady who was next to me at the stoplight rolled down her window and started screaming at me pounding the side of her SUV. I also had an experience when I was in jail because of this relationship where two girls who I also sensed demons in were making fun of this man next to me having a seizure and then they stopped and looked at me and started whispering. It was one of those things where you could just sense it. My Bible had disappeared a couple months into that relationship. I looked for it all over. After I ended that relationship I found my Bible right in one of the places I had looked.)
4. Change of behavior. (When you are living in the will of God your fruits will match up, but when you step out of it your fruit becomes rotten. I became someone who wasn't the person I had been before when I was living in the presence of Jesus.)
5. Division. (God recently had restored the relationship I had with my family back then and when this spirit was let in it sowed seeds of division and we started to divide and collapse. Satan is the head over dividing and conquering.)
6. Deceit. (Things won't line up constantly. Keep in mind that I say constantly.)
7. Disconnecting grace and the law of righteousness. (I heard many times, "God's grace is sufficient"  being abused and used as a means to manipulate and keep me stuck in the sin I was partaking in. I was called religious for wanting to live righteous. Do not let anybody tell you that...ever. Walking with Jesus is walking in righteousness.)

    Above all be on watch. STAY PRAYED UP. Demons are REAL. Ask God for discernment. Hide your heart in His Word so that you may be able to do so. TEST THE SPIRITS. Always, always take God's Word over man's. Please. This is so very, very important and vital to the body of Christ. If you need any clarification or you have any questions or comments please leave them below or e-mail me at: confessionsofachurchkid@gmail.com

I would love to talk to you and pray for you.

God's True Grace

God's True Grace

By: Elaina Grace Morgan

 

 

God's grace is sufficient..

But there's a point

In which

God hands people over to their wickedness.

 

Allegedly they're handed over to their own frigidness

Because they decided..

To despise..

The warnings of the wise.

 

It's one thing to struggle..

And another thing to juggle

With sin..

And to twist grace to deceive many men.

 

It's one thing to fall..

And another thing to be immersed in it all

With no remorse

Or change of course.

 

Especially when grace is used as an excuse..

To misuse, accuse, and abuse..

And curse...

The innocent in an instant

 

As well as confuse infants

With fake brilliance.

Let's make it our mission..

To be in submission to Jesus Christ.

And recognize flaws and faults..

From the false.



The Image of Transparency

The Image of Transparency

By: Elaina Grace Morgan

You all up on here carin' about your image like Cain

While I'm just doing damage with the transparency of what I say.

I ain't perfect.

I make mistakes.

But you just on here tryin' to imitate..

The world

With the words you spill 

And the poison you hurl on Saturday nights.

That's what I used to be like

But now on Sunday mornings I learn to be like,

Love like Christ

Instead of loving like those one stand nights.

I'm new.

Let me tell you

It wasn't worth it when the night was through.

Love with no attachments led to other people's misjudgments about me.

Slut, hoe, whore.

Well with that night I thought I won..

The heart of the man who I adored 

In place of the innocent lamb who I ignored..

Swapped..

For a man in a mask,

A man who played around like it was an important task.

Cheater, cheater, pumpkin eater.
Had another and didn't love her.

Spiritual maturity like a nursery rhyme,
Recognized, realized, and brought into the light.
I was confused.
Heard so many "God bless you's."
Which "god" are you talking about!?
For the first time in my life I started to doubt
What I really knew -
The truth.
Yet the one and only God pulled me out.
I was blind, but now I can see
The ugliness of deceit.

Let this be a lesson.
Not of defeat,
But of victory and freedom..
Because He was watching over me.
Protected by the blood..
From
Wolves in sheep masks.
Always declare, "Let there be light" and ask..
For discernment,
What a beautiful, beautiful adornment.

Hypocrisy

Hypocrisy

By: Elaina Grace Morgan

If you be preachin'

And you be teachin'

And you ain't livin'

You best be leavin'

'Cause they don't need hypocrisy.

This is not a democracy

'Cause right and wrong are declared by the word of my God.

His discipline is more severe than the rod.

Yeah.

He knows your heart,

But continuing in your sin is gonna tear you apart.

Repent

And He'll give you a new start,

But if you keep on seducin'

You'll keep on producin'

Rotten fruit.

Shoot.

Send you further than Beirut.

Truth.

Turn from your trash.

'Cause the day you die your idols ain't gonna last.

Fact.

Your life is screamin' Gucci, Louis, Fendi, Prada..

Whateva.

But your mouth is singin' I got nada.

And then what your speakin' is the truth,

But your life ain't livin' proof.

You know Satan's plan is to deceive ya and lead ya to the gates of hell.

So watch out for these hypocrites for real..

'Cause there's no cutting deals 

When it's all said and done.

And whatcha gonna say?

I was just livin' for fun.